Going Nowhere Fast

One piece of advice I received from many people when I first decided I was going to start this healthy adventure was don't try to do too much too fast. My first week really just focused on eating better and doing some research on motivation. The motivation was primarily on how to force myself to exercise.

I have a condition called arthritic sarcoidosis. Basically, it means my body is attacking my joints (right now it's only in my hands,) but it causes a lot of swelling and a good amount of pain. Although I can dull the pain with medication, I no longer have much strength in my hands or wrist. So forcing myself to exercise is a pretty big chore, because the last thing I want to do when I'm hurting is do something that I know will make me hurt more. With that said, I promised myself no excuses!

I used the elliptical for only 15 minutes yesterday morning and was struggling for breath... yes, I'm THAT out of shape. As I was starting to feel really down after a great weigh-in, I remembered when Nic and I first went to the gym with Scott it was the same way. I also remembered that by the end of the week I was at 45 minutes with no problems. So I got back on today and went for 30 minutes, then did 15 minutes of stretching and light (5 lbs) weight lifting.

Although my body is a little shaky, I feel really good! I don't feel like I'm pushing myself too hard too fast, and I just keep reminding myself that it will get easier, and the more weight I lose, the less pressure there will be on my already tender joints.

My First Weigh-In

First of all - I really have to thank everyone that is reading this. Many of you have sent me personal emails with words of motivation, tips on a healthy life or just telling me your story. I have to say that they have all been extremely motivational! So please continue to do so, and know you're welcome to post in the comments here anytime. Knowing there are people following my journey makes me work that much harder!

I literally tossed and turned last night worried about this morning. I knew I had worked hard, but I also knew I probably could have done more. I made a promise to myself that even if I hadn't lost any weight (or worse yet, gained some,) I wouldn't stop trying. So I held my breath and stepped on the scale........ 6.8 lbs LOST!!! In one week I lost nearly 7 lbs. I'm sure a good amount of it was water weight that always comes off in the first week, but it was much higher than the 2-3 lb goal I set for myself!

I'm so proud of my first week's progress, but know I have a long way to go! Time to add exercise to the mix and continue towards my final goal!

Things learned this week:

1. I will eventually have to deal with the emotional issues tied to my overeating

2. I need to think before I eat

3. Substitute, don't eliminate

4. Try new foods - even ones I thought I hated

5. Not everything I make will be good - I'm bound to fail at cooking/baking from time to time.

It Takes Two

Two exciting things happened today - I made another amazing dinner and I avoided a huge temptation!

Let's start with the dinner. I have really learned to love cooking! I'm forcing myself to eat things I normally wouldn't and I'm (hopefully) getting healthier. I have to admit, I have become slightly addicted to sparkpeople.com, so I pulled another recipe from there - Laughing Cow Chicken Cordon Bleu. The recipe online says it has 217 calories, but I did my own math and it came to 235 calories, which is still really good, especially for a dinner. Four simple ingredients, chicken, cheese, lean ham and shake and bake made this a fantastic dish.

The chicken was great (Nic and I were literally "mmmmming" the entire time we were eating it,) but I'm still having a hard time with eating more veggies, so I melted another wedge of laughing cow cheese (35 calories) and poured it on top of my broccoli, which made it much more flavorful and tolerable. Total calories for the whole meal came to 324 which I am extremely pleased with.

That was win number one today! Win number two actually took place at work. We were having a farewell get together for one of my coworkers who is leaving the company I work at and they brought in cupcakes for her. I normally wouldn't think twice, but knowing I would have to be accountable to the WWW, I passed on them and instead ate a caramel rice cake. It was actually quite satisfying to have something sweet at the same time everyone else was. I honestly didn't even miss eating the cupcake!

So it was a win-win day today and I'm looking forward to Sunday's weigh in!

They Can't All Be Winners

If you ask pretty much anyone I know they will tell you I love to bake. In fact, I would like to eventually have a little side business that is centered around all the goodies I can make. But I'm not a huge fan of sweets. I prefer something savory to something sweet 9 times out of 10, however there is that 1 time that I am craving something sweet, and I'm usually going to go for chocolate.

I was really desperate the other night so I went onto sparkpeople.com hoping to find something that would help satisfy my urge for chocolate. I came across a recipe for frozen chocolate cheesecake bites and was intrigued, especially since they were only 30 calories a piece. I had everything in the house I would need to make them, so I thought I would give it a shot. To start with, I had a hard time getting the fat-free cream cheese smooth. Adding the rest of the other ingredients was easy - unsweetened coco powder, splenda, lite cool whip and vanilla. Once it was all mixed I poured it into a flexible mold tray I got for Christmas (the recipe calls for ice cube trays, but I don't have those.) The best part was getting to top them with Nestle Chocolate Chips which I assumed meant there was NO way these could be bad.

After two hours in the freezer they popped out of the mold fairly easily and I was ready to indulge in two of them for my final 60 calories of the day. I cut them into 4ths in hopes of savoring every bite, but after my first one I didn't want to go back for more. The taste was pretty bad. The cream cheese was overwhelming and the texture was like a thick mayo - yuck!

The whole thing was a pretty big fail. I guess until I can find something that I can make with chocolate in it that's amazing AND low calorie, I'm going to stick to sugar free chocolate pudding. I don't think I can screw up Jello!

The Substitute

There should be a candle that smells like fresh baked bread. I love carbs - bread, pasta, cereal, potatoes... and I knew if I removed them from my diet I would only crave them more. BUT I know I have to limit them because they go directly to my hips, and butt, and arms... and well pretty much everywhere.

I started doing a little research and found some recipes for cheesy mashed cauliflower. DO NOT believe anyone that tells you it tastes just like mashed potatoes, because it doesn't, BUT it was still amazing. I went with a recipe from sparkpeople.com but wanted to alter it a little. I doubled the cauliflower, but only used the amount of other ingredients that were in the recipe, and since I didn't have parmesan cheese I added a little skim mozzarella. It resulted in cutting the calories to only 60.5 per serving (1/2 cup,) and while it was nothing like mashed potatoes, it was delicious and very satisfying.

But since I can't live on veggies alone (no seriously, I can't!) I made a diet coke chicken which was very simple and equally delicious. The recipe comes in at 162 calories, but I don't think I actually consumed them all because most of the sauce you cook it in (diet coke, catsup and salsa) stays in the pan. I did top it with 1 tablespoon of extra salsa for flavor and was very happy with the results. So for the sake of argument, I'm counting the full 162 calories because I would rather overestimate than underestimate.

Finally, I added a few blackberries with a pinch of splenda because they were a little bitter, bringing my total to 228.5 calories for the whole meal. My whole dinner was delicious, and something I will make again for sure. For the first time tonight, it really hit me, it's all about substituting, not eliminating.

Do You Know the Muffin (Wo)man?

I hate breakfast. There is nothing more I despise in the morning than forcing myself to eat, which, I know sounds crazy coming from someone who is pretty much addicted to food.

My morning routine is simple. I kick Nic out of bed at 5:35am to get into the shower and then get up myself at 5:40am to start my pre-shower routine which consists of brushing my hair and teeth and picking out clothes for the day. By 5:50am I'm in the shower and ready to go out the door by 6:15am. 35 minutes to get up, get ready and go. The LAST thing I want to do is take time to make breakfast and yes, that includes pouring a bowl of cereal and milk.

So what's a girl to do when EVERY site is telling me I have to eat breakfast to boost metabolism and energy and yada yada yada... My solution? Breakfast muffins! I made my first batch of Cheesy Sausage Muffins (a recipe from sparkpeople.com) the other night and they were super simple and easy! Using Bisquick's Heart Smart mix, pre-cooked turkey sausage, Kraft-free cheddar cheese, fat free cream cheese, a little bit of skim milk and 2 eggs, Voila! I made something I could freeze and warm up at work that only has 101 calories.

The test came this morning (since I didn't go to work yesterday) and I was okay with the results. They had great texture and the cubed cream cheese chucks were a nice touch, but overall, I think they lacked salt. I was expecting something savory and it was unexpectedly sweet. They were still in the "didn't taste like diet food category," but I think next time I'll adjust the recipe and add a pinch of sea salt to see if that helps.

By the way, if you're ever interested in the recipes I'm trying, let me know. I will either type it and send it to you or point you to the website I pulled it from.

My first fall

Today was definitely an adventure. Poor Nic, my husband, got food poisoning (from a fish burrito, not my cooking!) and we got to spend 1/2 the day in the ER. By the time we got home, I was starving and suffering from a headache from lack of sleep and nourishment. I'm not going to lie (remember, part of this blog is my accountability,) and I downed 5 Caramel Delight Girl Scout cookies without a second thought. So crap, I ate 375 calories that I'm now feeling horribly guilty about.

After beating myself up for the mistake I made, I remembered I had packed my lunch the night before planning to bring it to work with me today. So I unpacked it and ended up having the sandwich made from low fat turkey breast, mustard, lettuce and honey wheat sandwich thins, and two pickles. I skipped the diet soda and replaced it with water and didn't either the apple or the clementine because I was full. I know, I know... lunch meat is not a great "diet" food because it's loaded with sodium, but it's WAY better than take out and came in at just under 150 calories. I did end up having both fruits around 3:00 because I was craving something sweet.

Today really was a wakeup call for me. I realized that there are times I eat without thinking, which is why I didn't think twice about the Girl Scout cookies until after I had consumed them. By the time I got home from the ER I was so tired that food literally went into my mouth without my brain comprehending what I was doing. This is going to be a REALLY hard habit to break. I also realized my self control is nearly non-existent, so it's going to be in my best interest to keep tempting, unhealthy foods out of the house.

So even though I am disappointed in my lack of self control, I'm going to channel my inner Confucius and remember "Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising every time we fall."